Monday, February 16, 2015

New Stuff

Hello! Long time no blog. 

It snowed last night, and iced, so my Monday is a bit off, which I like. (good off, not bad off) 

I'm sitting here at our reception desk, in our main building which I haven't worked at in almost a month. I have been commuting to one of our field offices for the past few weeks. I wake up very early in the morning (which is NOT something I do naturally) and within an hour I am in my car for the hour-long drive to the office. It has become both my favorite and least favorite time of the day. Waking up so early is just NOT fun, but once I am up and around I am happy about my day. 

Before now, I had forgotten what it looked like to see the sun and moon both in the sky at the same time. On my way out of town, I pass the industrial area and the train yards. Since it is pretty cold outside the steam coming from the plants becomes art, with the hint of a sunrise behind the stacks but all of the lights are still on. Such a beautiful and new way to see our city. By the time the sun has come up enough, I notice the cows, the old farm houses, and sometimes deer in the fields along the road. At the halfway point there is an old rusty truck in the middle of a grove of trees, catching my eye because of the bits of turquoise paint that show through the rusty spots. I wonder how much I will miss all of these new scenes once I go back to work in our main office. 

Being here in the main office today is random. Our receptionist is sick at home and the road I have come to love is covered in ice and is treacherous right now. I snuck in another hour or two of sleep this morning, once I realized the drive would be near impossible to make. 

I am still living my Paleo lifestyle and loving it. This past weekend, Valentine's weekend, was the first time I ate tortilla chips since August. I ate 6 of them. I have lost 33.5 lbs since I started this journey and today is the first time I have been able to wear size 6 jeans in over 8 years! It feels so good! I have learned to cook several things by heart now - I just have to check the oven temperature because I can never remember that part. I am able to give advice to others who are struggling with weight loss, as I have learned much along the way. I still have between 11 and 20 lbs to go until I hit my goal weight, but I am so happy with the way I feel right now and I have a new drive that has been missing for a long time. 

As I lose the pounds, I feel like losing stuff. I want to just throw out most of my furniture, most of my old junk, most of the clutter in and around my desk, and just start over. I'm browsing through one of my favorite "wishbooks" grandinroad, which is put together by FRONTGATE. The realization just hit me that I'm ready for NEW STUFF. 

Not just things, but experiences and spaces and New paint. New arrangements of my stuff. New energy and ideas. New ways to interact with people and objects around me. 

I will be 46 in a month. The first time I said that out loud, was the first time I have ever felt trepidation about my age. As per usual I feel like I am a kid just pretending to be a grown-up, but there is a part of me that feels in charge of that kid now. That part of me is the new. That part of me speaks up when the child would be timid. That part of me is bold. That part of me knows that I can make a decision, and stick to it. I still struggle with feeling lazy and unmotivated on the weekends. I want to sleep in, watch my shows, play games...but even then I manage to get in a load of laundry, a load of dishes, and take out the trash. Sometimes I even clean the cat boxes when I feel like that. So even the way I am lazy is new. Ha! 

New stuff. That is going to be my 2015, I see. How very exciting to be me!

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